Tagged: Poetry

Morning Glory

You know, it just occurred to me, that whilst I have done a lot of things in my life…..I have never written a poem about getting a ‘Erection’…… 

Well, now I can say I have. 


Morning Glory

Whilst lights tendrils spill unrelenting through feeble glass barriers,

The unblinking eye arises!

Like Sauron watches over Mordor.

An unwavering, constant, blink less gaze.

Self appointed gatekeeper of our earthly pleasure,

His stewardship maintains his resolve.

More vein than vain,

He rises – Rejuvenated!

With all the promise only morning brings.

Yearning only to be free from his linen shackles of oppression.

The rage of captivity rushes through every angry inch!


To salute the sun,

The constant soldier,

Ever at attention with the breaking dawn…..


Just as clocks tick, time beckons him….

As from sleeps bosom, his mortal vessel rises to do his bidding.

Finally, Freedom!

To blossom like an ugly, ugly flower

And to bask in the joy that is his…Morning Glory!


The Warrior Poet….

The following, is a short poem I wrote a few years ago, whilst I was off my face on Booze, Hash and Endone…..It was definitely one of my finer moments….

At the time, I was listening to ‘Gabriel’ by Lamb….a truly moving, etherial – beautiful song! A song so powerful, that when I awoke on the floor of my lounge room, with broken crisps stuck to my face and a small puddle of drool on the floor, I realised I had been inspired to release my emotions through the medium of poetry…..enjoy!

“Ode to Cottonelle”

Of purist white,
your colours subtle beauty…
a spirit reflected on every ply.
Only in your absence do we dare remember the abrasive alternatives.
To roll over,
to roll under,
to scrunch,
to fold?
Whatever your desire…
These fanciful trends cannot change my love for thee!
That subtle touch.
That lingering stain.
How I long for your scented embossed perfection…..

***This Poem was written in honour of the toilet paper “Cottonelle” after enduring 3 days wiping my arse with pages from the phone book***